4th Issue

name = crystal angela

where = indiana  

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...

Help me Dog, I'm so in love with you!  What should I do??  You are just so cute... especially your voice, it is just the cutest thing in the world!  If I scratch you under your chin and kiss you on your nose and stare deeply into your eyes will you give me a little woof and breathe sweet nothings into my ear?  I could die a happy girl if I could hear you whisper into my brain all of the nothingness that swims around in your head!

*kiss kiss*

I love you too, Cat, so don't feel left out :)

 Dog: Awww heh heh.  (Blushes a lot)  Umm Cat what does she mean by sweet nothings?  I always hear that but how can sweet be nothing?

  Cat:  (sulking, pretending to ignore Dog) Humph!  

  Dog:  Aww Cat, she’s a fan of you too, but what are sweet nothings.  How can nothings be sweet? 

  Cat:  It’s just a saying a Dog, a phrase that means to say sweet romantic words to someone.  Like, roses are red violets are blue, my palms are sweaty so either I have tuberculosis or I’m in love with you.

  Dog: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH! I get it now! (Blushes more brighter now) I don’t know what to say, I’m not used to this attention.

  Cat: Puhlease!  Everyone loves you it can get downright sickening.  Both Ingrid twins wanted to talk to you but ignored me.  (pout)

  Dog:  No Cat, Ingrid liked you too.   And what about Lorraine? And all sorts of other fans we’ve heard from that find you handsome?

  Cat:  I guess so.   

  Dog:  See?  You’re wowie kaboodles too!  Now lets get back to Crystal.  Your words are really pretty.  (Blushes again)

 Cat:  A natural poet!  Very lovely and deep writing.  Do you write stories in your spare time Crystal?  You certainly should!  Your creativity, and emotional writing will make excellent stories.  You could write about what kind of date you would want with Dog.  Fantasies are fun like that.  Plus it helps prepare you for when that special fellow comes into your life someday.    If you have a crush on Dog, then the ideal guy for you is someone friendly and outgoing, athletic and energetic, loyal and sweet.    Never settle for what you don’t want.  I’m sure a gal with such romantic words can woo a very friendly Dog-like guy.   

 Dog:  Hi ho diggety!  I think so too!  Enjoy writing about me Crystal my little sweet tasty piece of pork from 1997 moldy aged to perfection yuuummy!  How’s that for sweet nothings Cat?

  Cat:  Yuck, uh well…very Dog-like.  (rolls eyes)

 Dog:  Awe Cat, heh heh heh now you’re making me blush.  Heh heh heeeeh

 Cat: (sighs, mutters dogs under breath) Next question. 

name = christopher smith

where = somewhere in the pacific ocean

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... i'm stranded in the middle of the pacifc ocean. I'm from Los Angeles, and my family is stuck in this island without any other people, HELLLLLLLPPPPPP!!!

 Dog:  Wowie kaboodles!  Is it a traffic island?  Wow when we got stranded on a traffic island Cat almost ate me it was just horrible!

  Cat:  Well hey!  You almost ate me too you know! 

  Dog: Oh yeah I guess I did.  We both were very gone.    We need to send a rescue party to Christopher! 

  Cat:  Absolutely!   Never fear CatDog is here!   Though here’s a thought, if you got Internet access then alert a rescue plane or ship.   They’ll pick you up in no time whatsoever! 

  Dog:  No time?  That’s not even a second Cat, don’t lie like that and get his hopes up.   It’s going to take more time than no time. 

  Cat: Argh!  It’s an expression again Dog, it means soon.  Dog sometimes I just don’t know about you!

  Dog:  Sure you do Cat you know plenty about me, like I know all sorts of things about you, like how you were in love with Tahlulah and sent yourself a very steamy love note to yourself saying it was from her, with lots of nothing sweets and….

  Cat: DOG!!! Be quiet don’t say things like that!  He’s kidding honestly he is. 

  Dog: No I’m not I have the letter right here want me to read it?

  Cat: (quickly grabs the letter and crumples it up, and eats it) rrrrnexxtt  wquestionwwrrr!

name = bowser

where = san bruno, ca ( near san fransico )

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...I want to be RICH!!! but I can't, help

me!!!!!! and if you do, can I have your money???

Cat:  Mm money!  How I loooove money!  I don’t blame you lets sing the money song and dream “ When you've got money what else do you need?  Who needs friends? Just give me GREED!   I love the way it smells, I love the way it sounds, I love the bucks, the marks, the yens, the francs, and the pounds! I love money…”Mm someday…someday I will be rich no matter what it takes.

Dog:  Cat!  Stop that!  Now you know very well there’s more to life than riches!  There’s your family your friends!  Shame on you! You are setting a bad example!  Bowser, don’t listen to my brother money doesn’t buy happiness, but…

 Cat:  But it can make your sadness very comfortable swimming in a pool of milk and eating caviar like there’s no tomorrow...

 Dog:  Cat!  Be quiet!  You’re ramblings and daydreams aren’t helping our friend.  So take a lesson from me then.

Cat:  But, giving advice is my..

Dog puts a piece of scotch tape over Cat’s mouth

Dog:  Ok now, what I was trying to get across sure it’s important to have money to survive, it’s not necessary to be the richest on the block.   Sure it’s nice to be wealthy, but not at the cost of your niceness.  It’s not right to steal, or stomp on whom you can to get to the top.  People that do that are not kind, and someday will be sorry because who will trust them?   Sometimes the richest person is poor in the heart because of all the people they hurt to get there.   Having goals of success is fine, but not if the hill to success is dishonest.  Also make sure whatever career you choose you like.  You don’t want to be stuck in a job you hate, no matter how much money you make.  Sure, it may sound fine now, but when you get there, doing something you hate to do but having all the money you can bathe in is not going to bring you closer to happiness.    You’ll find more peace investing more in your loved ones, hobbies and life in general than the stock market. 

Cat rips the tape off his mouth

Cat: YOWCH!  Ok, I guess Dog is right.  Money is not the most important thing in life.   But Dog wait a second you missed something.  Money is important for survival.  Everything costs money, food, shelter, clothing, etc.  So Bowser, money is important for that.  Saving is good for these goals.  Make sure to get into a healthy habit of saving money.  Treat yourself once in a while but don’t go overboard.   

Dog:  It’s the greed.  Don’t let yourself become a greedy monster.  That’s not good.    Too much greed will make you lose the nice person inside.  Don’t let that happen to you.  When Cat lets out that greedy monster sometimes, he becomes a totally different cat.  Like a few minutes ago.  He started daydreaming about money; his greedy side took over, and clouded his judgment of helping you until I snapped him out of it. 

Cat:  Dog your right.  I’m sorry Bowser, greed is one of my weaknesses. 

Dog:  It’s alright Cat.    Thanks for writing Bowser. 

name = someone out there........

where = Atlanta, Georgia

comments = DO YOU HAVE A PLAYSTATION 2? I DO.

Dog: beneath the pale moonlight…Awe I love that song from American Tail.  It gives me goose bumps!   We don’t have a Playstation 2 yet, still just the first one, but I asked Cat to get it for my birthday so hopefully he will!

  Cat:  Oh right, like I want to watch you rot what little brain you have playing video games one is good enough!

  Dog:  But Cat, I think Playstation 2 is also a DVD player too.  And then you could finally play your “Cats” dvd you got for a present one time.

  Cat:   They are?  Well in that case we’ll have to get a Playstation 2 and fast!  Next question.

  name = Falco Lombardi

where = CA

comments = Dr. MeowWoof... have you seen the new movie "Finding Nemo"???

( I did, it was great. )

  P.S- TO CAT: IF YOU DID SEEN IT, TELL ME IF THE MOVIE MADE YOU VERY

HUNGRY...

Cat: (Licking chops, thinking of the movie previews alone) They do like quite delectable I must say. 

  Dog:  We haven’t seen Finding Nemo yet but want to see it very soon, because it looks very good.    Thanks for recommending it Falco!  We’ll see it soon then. 

name = Gori

where = San Francisco, Califorinia

comments = I AM NOT JOKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I REALLY DO HAVE SARS!!!!

  name = Gori Unio

where = Califorina ( San Francisco )

comments = I'M NOT SCARED EITHIER!!!! I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY DO HAVE

SARS!!!!

  name = Gori Unio

where = San Fran. CA

comments = I HAVEN'T BEEN TO ANY OF THE AFFECTED AREAS BUT MY BOYFRIEND DID HE GOT ONE TOO! I GUESS IV'E GOT ONE TOO!!!

Dog: Wowie kaboodles.  I can’t think of anything else.   If this is not a joke I will surely hope for the best for Gori.  I just hope it is a joke, way too much tragedy out there.

  Cat:   Me too.   Thanks for writing back, and we believe you, after all we are just cute cartoon characters.    It’s a shame that these new diseases are sprouting up all over the world.  Just take care of yourself the both of you, listen to your doctor and hope all turns out well.  I wish we could say more but not sure what to say.  Be careful out there.

name = Amber

where = Toronto, Ontario

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... I FOUND A PETITION ONLINE, AND IT SAYS " GET RID OF CATDOG ", ISN'T THAT AWFUL, ANS THERE'S 5,000 SIGNATURES IN THAT PETITION , AND THERE'S ONLY 400 IN YOUR'S JUST TO SAVE CATDOG. ONCE AGAIN , ISN'T IT AWFUL...

Dog:  (sadly sighs) Yes it does hurt sometimes.  I don’t get it all the time.

  Cat: We are happy for the fans we do have.  We’d love to be as popular as other cartoon pals, but who knows maybe someday our day will come.  Things haven’t been all that bad, we have a very nice home and enjoy the friends and fans we do have.  We appreciate the fan support and no matter the critics, we take comfort in knowing that we have many adoring fans all over the globe.   True fans that like us is better than a slew of people just liking us because we’re popular and that’s it.   Popularity isn’t everything.  So sure maybe we didn’t get the media support we deserved, but I’d rather eat moldy meat than have our cartoon changed to satisfy a more media friendly conventional crowd.    That’s not what we are all about.  We are about breaking the molds!  Daring to be different and more realistic emotionally.   Some people have a hard time accepting our type of cartoon. 

  Dog:  They judge us too quickly without looking deeper.  I’m a very simple lovable dog, that doesn’t understand that all the time.

  Cat:  Everything no matter how popular has its share of critics anyways.  Can’t please everyone unfortunately.  I could go into a big speech but I think I’ll just leave it at this.  Thanks for writing Amber and keep watching. 

name = Spongebobby

where = Atlanta, Georgia

comments = DO YOU LIKE SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS???

Dog: Spongebob is a good friend of ours!  And people always say I sound like him for some reason.  I don’t know why I don’t think I do.  (Starts mimicking Spongebob and sounding 100 percent authentic for obvious reasons) “I’M READY I’M READY!   KRABBY PATTY!”  See I don’t sound anything like him.

  Cat: (just looks at Dog) Umm Dog?

  Dog: Yeah? (still sounding like SB)

  Cat: Err never mind, next question.   Hoo hoo hooooo!  (like Tigger)

name = Mysty

where = Sanford, MI

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...

  I'm twelve and constantly under label as "the one who knows everything" or "Miss-silent, never talks but writes instead." If a class and I at in a room and the class was asked who could answer it, they would pick me.

If I make one mistake, almost everyone sort-of silently gasps. I'm not perfect. How can I make them see that?

Cat: Mm the perils of brilliance.  A burden I share as well…(said in Cat’s typical proud way)

  Dog: (makes a raspberry sound)

  Cat:  Knock it off!   First, there’s nothing wrong with having your thoughts and opinions trusted.  It’s a wonderful experience.  Yes, I understand it’s tough, to be labeled and maybe you feel a little embarrassed when people take notice to the times you don’t have the answers.   Feeling embarrassed is completely understandable.  This has happened to me before too.  A few not a whole lot of times, I’ve felt embarrassed not having the right answer...

  Dog:  heh heh heee a few times?  I think it’s happened to you a lot more than a few Cat! Heh heh heh.

Cat:  Well…now err…no matter the number; I don’t always have the answers to everything.  Shoosh Dog! 

  Dog:  Just messing with ya!  (Pats Cat’s frustrated head) I remember a few students like that when we went to school; they got good grades and seemed to know all the answers.   To me they always seemed perfect in the smarts department.   Perhaps they felt like Mysty.  What do you think Cat?

  Cat:  I think it’s probable.   A nice thought to consider Mysty, your parents and teachers are encouraging you.   I understand the pressure it can create, but they want you to have the confidence in yourself and your brain.  Take it as complimentary.  People recognize your given talents, and compliment you by thinking you have the answers.   While it may seem overwhelming at times, it’s for your own good.  Think about it this way, what if nobody took notice to your accomplishments at all.  Would you feel better ignored completely?  Probably not, you might feel worse.  Try to realize that your friends, family and teachers are doing what they can to encourage you.    No one is perfect, and I’m sure that they realize that you’re not perfect too.  They just want you to recognize your potential and do your best.  So I say enjoy it, enjoy the knowledge that other people recognize your brilliance.  

  Dog:  If you feel frustrated, talk to someone about it.  Speak your mind, and tell them how you are feeling like you told us.  They will gladly help you out.     When people get surprised just say something like wowie kaboodles I don’t have all the answers but thanks for thinking I do that means you’ll vote for me for class presy right?  Joke around about it.   Say something silly and cute like that.   Be a charming a pup like me. Heh heee

  Cat:  As you get older and classes become more involved you’ll meet more people that hold many powerful brain waves too.  They won’t always have the answers to some questions either.  When you don’t have an answer they probably won’t, and when you do have the answer 5 others will as well.  It all varies from one subject to another where you excel in English and writing others may not, but may excel in math and science.    So don’t worry, it’s all part of learning.

  But, to answer your question can you get people to realize you don’t have all the answers, well that’s a tough one.  Like I said earlier some people the teachers, your family, friends etc, do realize that you aren’t perfect just like all of us, but don’t want to discourage you.  As for less wise individuals those people that don’t know you only see what they see, may never be convinced, or are just simply saying first thoughts that come to mind.  Think about others, for example your family doctor.  Of course your doctor’s smart, of course he knows a lot about his practice but every now and then he may become stumped by a patient's questions.  Perhaps he has to consult his medical books, or talk to another doctor friend about it.   So the reaction of the patient is shock, oh my goodness my own doctor is unsure?  What’s wrong?   Well simply put he or she is human.   Does that make he or she a bad doctor?  No, of course not.   Just for some reason the doctor couldn’t answer the patient’s question at that particular moment.   So just think how frustrating people have it in actual professions where they are “expected” to know it all in his or her field.  

  Dog:  I think what Cat and I are trying to say, is relax a little.  Don’t worry too much what everyone is thinking, take your recognition as a smart person as a compliment, and next time you don’t know the answer right away, realize by these examples and as you get older that everyone faces these feelings from time to time.  Try not to be embarrassed about it.  It’s difficult, but take comfort that we all go through it in our expert areas.  I know a ton about “Mean Bob in Outer Space movies”, but not every single detail by heart. 

  Cat:  Thanks for the question Mysty, hope we’ve helped some.  Have a great time back to school this fall!

name = Larry

where = Maine

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...I broke up with my girlfriend last month, and i wan't her back again now, but she refuses. How can I get her back now????

Cat:   Aw l’amour.  It’s such a tough twisting roller coaster of emotion.   

  Dog:  Poor Larry is there anything we can do? 

  Cat:  Many factors must be considered here.   What was the reason for the break up in the first place?  If you broke up with her, are you sure that it’s worth trying to mend?  It depends on how you both feel in your heart about one another and how the relationship was working in the first place.  Gaining back your relationship with her probably won’t be easy, but its possible.  Will it work that’s a game of chance, Dog and I can’t 100 percent tell you that if you buy her roses and request songs on the radio that you’ll win her back.  Romantic attention doesn’t hurt, but don’t do it so often that you get accused of stalking.  Here’s what is probably going on in her head at the moment.   Since you said you broke up with her, she’s hurt.  So she’s having difficulty trusting you right now.  When couples break up it feels awful, an emotion that people dread to go through again especially with the same person.    She’s probably afraid to get back together for fear that you will hurt her again.  If feasible you need to gain her trust back.   This could take a extensive time depending on her personality, how long you were together, how deep the relationship, and what she does now.    What you also have to reflect on is yourself.  Is trying again really what you want to do?  What do you miss about she?  Many relationship levels exist.   Like Infatuation; you don’t exactly know the person, you just have fun and enjoy how that person makes you feel.   Then there’s the deeper level where it’s not just physical feelings but emotional as well, you know her favorite color, you know her deepest fear as a child, and vice versa with you.     So if the reason you want her back is guaranteed dates weekends and less lonely, more physical reasons like that, then chances are that’s not a good reason to get back together.  However, if the reasons are deeper, you miss the friendship you had with her, those long hours talking to her, and how much you guys had in common; then maybe getting together again is acceptable.  Relationships, whether significant others, siblings, friends, etc. take time and patience to work.  No relationship is perfect.  Take for example Dog and I, we don’t always get along but our love for each other as siblings keeps us together and forces us to work together no matter what the disagreement.

  Dog:  That’s right Cat!  We don’t always agree on everything, but that’s what doesn’t matter, how hard we try to cooperate and understand one another is what matters.    It’s my opinion not jump back in right away, think about it for a while first.   In our last issue we got a question that was similar to this one about relationships, it might help to read that one too.  The question was from Mamba, and that person was suffering from a broken heart too.

  Cat:  Speaking of Mamba, we told Mamba missing something you become accustomed to, makes it difficult to let go.  That’s where time plays a big role.  The more time passes the easier things will be to let go.  If it’s possible find a way to talk to her, see if it’s promising to work things out again someday.   Apologize to her very sincerely for hurting her.  Make sure that she knows that you didn’t mean it; you made a mistake in judgment.  Best of luck to you Larry, but remember give her some time, and give yourself time.  Make sure getting together is the right thing to do for the both of you.

  name = To whom it may concern

where = Houston , Texas

comments = IF YOU GUYS WE'RE REAL , WHERE WOULD YOU LIVE?

Dog:  What does he mean Cat? 

  Cat: I’m not sure.  We live in Nearburg, but if we didn’t live here it would be nice to live in Parisburg .

 Dog:  Or Hawaiiburg. 

  Cat: Mmm paradise!    (Pinches self) OUCH!   That felt very real to me!  (pinches Dog)

  Dog: Owweee!   The pain is real.  Just like us! 

 (Suddenly a scary eraser and pencil comes by and erases Dog’s nose then replaces it with a baseball, w hich falls to the ground.)

  Dog:  BALL!  I’m gonna get ya!  (Pounces all over trying to catch baseball)

  Cat: Dog! DOG!  Stop it!  What’s wrong with you?

(pencil, draws a tasty white fish chub on a plate for Cat to eat)

Cat: YUMMY!  White fish chub! 

  (script change, CatDog forgets what question was about and then moves to next question, Dog’s nose magically goes back to normal and they are ready to give more advice.)

name = Tori

where = Canada

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...Can you help me beat Super Mario Sunshine for me?

Dog:  Haven’t played that before, I’m still stuck on the Mean Bob game I have, darn it.  I’m still stuck on the level where you have to fly up not jump but I keep jumping instead of flying and it’s very difficult.   Have you looked online for sites about Super Mario Sunshine?  Fans write up hints all the time for popular video games.    I’ll get out my trusty laptop and see if I can find a site for you that might possibly help…

Here’s a site that might be a good place to look.  Read the cheats and hints there, of all sorts of games you like.   Check the “walkthrough” areas.  If you’re not sure what that means, briefly its fans writing up detail descriptions of what players should do on each game level of a game.    This site is good place to start:

http://www.gamefaqs.com/

  Other sites like this offer game hints.  If you don’t find what you’re looking for, do a web search for Super Mario cheats and hints.  Good luck! 

name = GILDER

where = WASH. D.C

comments = Is this website for young children?

Cat: It’s for all ages.  It’s here to entertain and inform CatDog fans no matter what the age.    As such it exercises the importance of making sure that the site is family friendly.  Thanks for the question. 

name = Shar Hromada

where = Bainbridge, N.Y.

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...

  My Maltese is constantly chewING on her hair on legs and caTCHES HAIR IN MOUTH THEY ACTS LIKE HAIR IS STICKING ON HER TONGUE CAUSING HER TO HAVE HAIRBALLS    wHAT KIND OF REMEDY DO I GIVE HER FOR THE HAIRBALL IN HER THROAT.  CAN I GIVE HER THE CAT POUNCE OR WILL THAT MAKE HER SICK?

THANK YOU

Dog:  Sorry it might be best to ask your trusted vet these kinds of questions.  However, I can do a little web search see if I can direct you to some sites about hairballs.  Actually Cat, didn’t we have a question similar to this?

  Cat:  Yes we did and these questions are icky reminders.  I just hate hairballs.  They are no fun.  They drain my energy.

  Dog:  That’s why you need that gel-like stuff to lick off your paws it helps and you know it no matter how strange it feels.   Lets see here…ok one thing you have to be careful of when buying hairball formulas is the sugar.  Too much sugar is bad health wise for the kitty you don’t want your cat getting unhealthy from too many sugars.   Cats of course vary too.  I mean I’m now looking at these cat owner opinions at this “Epinions” site for Pounce Treats.  It looks like the views are more positive than negative.   You can check this out here:

http://www.epinions.com/pets-Cats-Treats-All-Pounce_Treats_for_Cats/display_~reviews

http://www.petadvice.net/

  Hope that helps you some. Remember to make sure to talk to your vet about such questions too.  Also you can visit many sites that offer helpful pet tips and forums to talk to other pet owners and experts.   Scroll down and try the sites I offered to Tiffany in the very next question.

name = Tiffany

where = arizona

comments = I'm 12 years old , and my dog throws after 4 hours of eating regular healthy dog food. And she keeps on biting me and bites other people. She chocks on a leash and likes to eat barbequees. But she keeps on throwing up on it. So could please help me with this problem?

From ,

  Tiffamy Carter , 12

Scottsdale , AZ

Cat:  It sounds like your pup could use a trip to vet.  Talk to your parents about it, and make an appointment for your dog.  In the meantime, try to keep your dog away from foods that make her sick.    All pets vary with what their stomachs can handle.  Dog here, of course can eat all sorts of food and not be phased at all.  But some dogs have a very sensitive stomach and must be monitored a little better.  Again your pet’s vet will help answer this question a little better for you.  Also visit pet sites, go to forums where expert pet advice can be given to you to help out as well.  Here are some sites that might help you get started:

  http://www.petco.com/

http://www.petadvice.net/

http://guardianangelpets.tripod.com/petadvice/

http://www.ddfl.org/tips.htm/

  Try them and if they don’t help keep searching.  They should be pretty good though.  Be aware that while I was searching some of the pet advice sites have a fee to join, and some are free.    Just in case you would be worried about that.  Tiffany and Shar I hope these links help you.   Thanks for writing.

  name = Jake

where = New York City

 

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...I'm lost find me!!!!!!!!

Dog: Hmm it says you from New York City. 

  (CatDog look at one another and remember what they heard on the news.)

  Dog:  Jake, we hope very much that you are ok after that big black out.    We wish you and your loved ones the best.    We have some friends in NYC right now that we hope are doing ok.  

  Cat:  Hopefully everything worked out fine.  We’d love to hear from you again, just so that we know you survived the black out.   So if you want to, write back, and tell us how you handled the situation.   Thanks for writing and be safe!

name = Katelyn

where = GA

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...I lost at a singing tournament.

Dog: Aww Katelyn it’s ok.  Everything will be all right.  Did you get nervous?  Don’t let this get 

you down other singing opportunities will come along.  Cat can tell you some of things we’ve 

tried out for and didn’t make, but then we tried out again another time and did fine.  Right Cat?

 
Cat:  You got it Dog.  Opportunities for other singing competitions will come around again.  

Do you take voice lessons?  That might help your confidence a little better, because an 

instructor can tell you how to train for it what warm up exercises you can do to make your 

voice a much better instrument than now.  The more practice you do for your voice the better 

you’ll become.   

Dog: A standing ovation for having the guts to stand up and try out for something in front of 

others. 

(Cat and Dog both stand and applaud)

Dog:  Some people get stage fright and don’t have the strength and braveness to do 

something like try out for a singing competition. You should feel proud that you could do that 

in the first place.  This kind of bravery will take you far in life.  It will help you in facing other 

situations, like standing up in front of your class to give an oral report.  That’s like standing on 

stage.   

Cat:   We say don’t give up, and try not to let yourself get down from this experience.  Learn 

from it.  Think about the possibilities of why you didn’t make it this time.  Did you forget the 

words?  Were you prepared enough?  Many factors could be the reason, it’s up to you to 

figure out what they are and improve from them.  So say you did forget a phrase in the song, 

next time memorize and practice the song a little more than you did for this competition.  If that

 was the case, then there’s a possible solution for you next time.  So figure out what you did 

wrong.  Or, well maybe you didn’t do anything wrong.  Maybe all of the people that tried out 

were very good like you, and it was hard to choose.  Just keep trying.  Keep trying out.  Don’t 

be afraid of your mistakes learn from them.  We are all far from perfect, and no matter how 

good we are at something there is always room for improvement.  Think about your singing 

role models.  These singers were turned down at times too.  They just didn’t give up, and kept 

at it.  That’s what you have to do.  Stay strong Katelyn and break a leg at your next 

competition.

name = mark

where = colorado

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...My pet died last weekend and I can't 

seem to replace him.

 (He was a Cat.) And was soooooo young.  I feel 

depressed or something cause i have been 

with him all my life , could you help me.

Dog:  Poor Mark I feel bad, it’s awful to lose a pet. 

  Cat:  Yes grieving is an excruciating emotion, very intense.   It helps to get your mind off of the loss for a while.  Go out and see a funny movie, or read a good book.  Do things that make you happy, while mourning the loss of your pet.  Spend lots of time with your loved ones.  Let them help make you feel better by talking and doing fun things with them. You will always have your memories, and the pain will lessen with time.   Death while sad is also happy in a way too.   You love your cat so much; feel the comfort of knowing your cat will never experience pain, sickness, uncomfortable hairballs, and smelly dogs chasing him.  Your cat rests in peace and tranquility now.  

When you are ready I suggest adopting another pet to love, because having at least one pet in your home can promote a very relaxing and loving atmosphere.  Dog and I have had pets that passed away, but eventually we got new ones to make new and happy memories just like the pets that died.    So take this time, and mourn gather your pictures and memories of your pet and cherish them, but don’t feel awkward about adopting a new pet to create new memories.

  Do g:  Remember, adopting another pet gives a lovable dog, cat, bird, mouse, etc, someone to love.  Just think of all the poor animals at your local animal shelter with no home.   Don’t think of it as replacing your pet that passed away, but opening your heart to a little cutie that deserves your love and kindness.    The benefits of letting a new little pal in your heart outweigh never having a pet again.  Mervis told us about this pet turtle he had as a kid, that passed away and his parents wouldn’t let him get a new pet for a while, but somehow he convinced his parents and brought home a very cute hamster.  This helped him feel a lot better.

  Cat:  I remember that.  His happiness increased as he loved and took care of his new hamster.  Allow yourself some time but consider getting a new pet if you can.  If anything stands in your way of getting a new pet like parents refusing, no pets allowed where you live currently, etc, don’t despair someday you’ll be able. 

  Dog:  Consider alternatives too.  Adopt a pet online like http://www.neopets.com for example.  I know it’s not the same as a real pet, but it’s a fun past time and feels like having your own.   That might lessen the pain.  Also take some time to visit sites that deal with the loss of pets as well.  Perhaps they could offer you better advice start here:  http://www.petloss.com/

Cat:  Hmm, that’s an interesting idea.   I agree with Dog, virtual pets have come a long way.  We offer you sincere sympathy for you loss, and hope that you feel better soon.    

name = WHO CAREWZ

where = Luling, TX

comments = Why don't you guys have a radio show or have your own radio station?

Dog:  Hi ho diggety!  That would be so cool wouldn’t it Cat?

  Cat:  Yes it would Dog.   I’ve always dreamed of having my own classical polka station.

  Dog: Yuck!  If we did a radio show we’d play rock n’ roll and monster truck sounds!  

  Cat:  Classical polka!

  Dog: Monster truck sounds!

  Cat: Classical polka!

  Dog: Rock n’ roll music to play with monster trucks!

  (Bickering goes on for a while till they get tired and out of breath)

  Cat:  Phew.  Now I forget the question.  Let me read it again.  (reads it) Oh yes now I remember!  They think we should have our own radio station. 

  Dog:  ROCK ‘N ROLL!  HI HO DIGGETY RADIO!  With plenty of monster truck rallies and music!

  Cat: My radio station will have nothing but the finer things.  Classical polka, how to cook white fish c hub, and the opera top 10.

  Dog: Zzzzz no way Cat!  That’s so boring!  Rock music and monster trucks and subs!

  C at:  CHUB!

  Dog: SUB!

  Cat: CHUB!

  Dog: SUB!

  (Once again CatDog is fighting again and cloud of fight smoke is drawn all around them.  A little blue guy peeps out of his hole in the wall to see what all the commotion is about and sees that CatDog is doing the whole advice thing again, but that they totally lost control.  Winslow looks at the questions, and sees they were on the last one.  And so Winslow lets CatDog argue it out, and throws sugar and flour on them in hopes they make a nice batch of delicious CatDog candy. )

Winslow:  Heh heh!  Well looks like Dr. fumblers are at it again.  What a couple of nuts!   (whispers so that CatDog don’t hear him) Hey patients if you want some real advice write to me Dr Winslow at yoir seoirvice!  Replace help Dr Catbutt with Help oh wise Winslow!   Cause CatDogs nuts!   Heh heh!

  See you next time, and take care!  (waves)

3rd Issue

name = mamba

where = tn

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...i love him a lot, and i'm depressed

without him...i want him back and i don't know how to let go

Dog: Awe poor Mamba, that's a major bummer.  

 Cat:   A broken heart takes time to heal.    Find constructive ways to channel your emotions.  Write a poem, or a story, draw a picture, play some music, or go for a walk, play some volleyball, baseball, swimming, whatever interests you, and makes you feel happy and confident.  Engage in fun activities, go to a movie with friends, get a new outfit, relax watch some television or read a good book. 

  Dog:  Friends, and family will help you through.  Talk to them whenever you feel down, don't be afraid to talk out how you feel with someone you trust.   Losing a best friend, or boyfriend, girl friend, isn't always easy but my brother and I assure you that it gets easier.   Yes it'll hurt for some time you have to expect that its normal.  Don't give up on dating, you'll find another special someone someday, but pace yourself for now.  Don’t get involved with another person until you’re sure that it’s right.   Just have confidence in yourself, and someone else will like you too.     Give yourself a big a hug like me.  (hugs self all smiley and cutely)

  Cat:    Yes a good idea.    Sometimes in the process of getting over someone it helps to think of reasons why the relationship didn't work in the first place.   A lot of times you'll find calling it quits was probably for the best for both.    Learn from the experience, and use this to help you in deciding your next significant other.   What is it you liked about this person?  What didn't you like?   Whether this was a mutual breakup, or not, you are better off.  Think about it.   Ask yourself this question; do you want to date someone that doesn’t share romantic interest as you do in him?  

Dog:  That’s unfair to you.    Never settle for someone that doesn’t treat you the way you should be treated.  

  Cat: Exactly.   Right now a mixture of feelings is stirring around.     You were used to his presence and a certain routine.    You reach a comfort level and security that you are unsure you'll ever gain again.   As we go through life we try on new experiences, people, etc, which fit and later don’t anymore.  

Dog:  Cheer up mamba! Never fear you will find another boyfriend again.  Just take it one day at a time, and soon you’ll see another nice guy that’s worth dating again.  

Cat:  You will always have the memories, and maybe not today or a week from now, but someday you'll look back and laugh, and say what in the world did I see in that dumb dog?

 Dog:  Hey! 

Cat: Oh sorry Dog, I meant dog as in dirty smelly creature that isn’t worth the time or energy.

Dog: Oh that’s ok…wait HEY that’s…

(Cat covers Dog’s mouth)

Cat: I’ll explain later, next question.

name = Talia

where = Plum Pa

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... My mom and dad got divorced and I don't know who to live with please help me

  Dog: Wowie kaboodles it's like choosing between me or Cat as best.

Cat: (all smug) Well not really, they all love me best...puurrrr

Dog: Caaat!  Be serious now….

Cat: Right right, as Dog said a decision like this is tedious, and quite frankly a little unfair to make.  But, these matters aren't always fair, so we have to deal with them as best as we can.    In choosing between two people you love very much, you have to remember that no matter whom you choose, it doesn't mean that you'll never see one of your parents again.   You will still be able to visit your mom or dad, and they visit you.    They are still your parents and you won’t lose them.  Both will still love you equally.    Make sure to express to everyone that no matter what the choice YOU want a fair deal as possible.  Make sure your parents know that you refuse to put up with their competitive natures involving this decision.  

Dog: Make it very clear that you love them both.   You will choose if you have to, but express to them you want a fair deal, to please consider your feelings.    Remember just because your mom and dad are getting a divorce doesn't mean you want to be separated from either of them for good.   

Cat: Stay strong Talia, and best of luck to you in this difficult time.  You are not alone many kids have divorced parents.  Remember that in the long run your mom and dad just want what's best for you.    Remind them, of that calmly.

Dog:  We suggest you seek some one on one counseling with someone you trust.  Talk to a teacher, or guidance counselor or relative, someone that can help you through your parents divorce.    We wish you only the best Talia, thanks for writing to us, and feel free to write again.   If you want to talk about this more, go into more detail with us, email and let us know. 

 Cat: Next patient.

name = anon

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... My parents are divorced and are

trying to get me and my sister for custody! My mom has no food in the house

and my dad lives with my uncle! I'm worried about what too do what

can i do?

Cat:  Hmm is this the same person that wrote to us earlier? Is this Talia?  It's hard to tell.    Anon read what we said to Talia, please tell your parents to consider you and your sister's feelings.   Again, no child should have to go through this, it’s a very stressful situation, but there isn’t a way out, you’ll have to make your decision on what feels best.  I stress to stay strong, tell your parents you want to have both of them in your life.  If they love you and your sister they will put your feelings first before their petty arguments and fighting for who keeps the car and who keeps the record collection.   You and your sister are not things!  You are living breathing human beings, their children.   If your parents aren’t already perhaps they should seek counseling themselves as well for suggestions tips on how to do what is best for their children.

name = TB

where = New York

comments = Help me Dr. MeowWoof... my dad and I don't get along very well. I've been living with my mom when his household became too unbearable-- that was eight years ago. Now he hardly ever gets involved with my life because he doesn't want to deal with Mom, and in turn I often forget about him. He complained to me about how he doesn't know anything that's going on with me, but he never tells Mom that himself. He especially complains about my not calling my little sisters who live with him, but the way he carries on, how can I call? I've often told him how I hated the way he used to hurt me, and how he continues to hurt me by treating me like I'm his psychiatrist / messenger girl / emotional punching bag. Worst of all, sometimes he doesn't talk to me himself-- he puts my stepmom on the phone to defend him, and that makes things much worse. Recently, I got into a huge fight with my stepmom over Dad on the phone, and she kept saying how tired she was of me saying how wrong Dad was, how I'm making him the bad guy and my mom the good guy, how I wish he'd act differently and how I should just accept the way he is... neither she or my father get the message I've repeatedly tried to convey to them. That I don't want just HIM in my life, I want a caring, loving, considerate FATHER. As much as he loves me, and as many presents as he sends me through the mail, is it so much to ask that he considers my feelings rather than just hurt them first and heal them later. It's not easy when you have a family split in two... it's like you're missing a part of yourself. I've never felt whole for all these years. What am I going to do?

Dog:  I’m speechless Cat is there anything we can say to help TB?

Cat:   We shall do our best.  We understand how you feel TB, it seems that your dad is acting stubborn, perhaps not seeing the big picture.   A good uninterrupted alone conversation might help.    Arrange to have some father and daughter time together, go out to a dinner, or somewhere where the two of you can talk seriously without interruptions.   If that can’t happen anytime soon, maybe you could write him a letter about it.  You did a tuuurific job telling us what is going on, now the tricky part is getting through to your dad.  

Dog:  Be very sincere, when you convey your feelings to your daddy.    Try not to criticize his actions of present and past, don’t be all judgy like with him.  Right Cat?

Cat:  Yes something like that. Realize that your dad is hurting too.   From what you told us part of the battle is almost won because he deep down wants to relate to you again as before.  Since you used to live with him, and now live with your mom, I’m sure some of his actions the way he doesn’t communicate, as he should is his pain.  He may feel rejected slightly that you moved out, and doesn’t know why you left.  Perhaps he’s afraid to lose you further, to lose you again in his mind, so he acts defensive towards you.   

Dog:  Maybe if you want your ol’ daddy back, talk to him about stuff.  Tell him about your favorite hobbies, pick a problem going on in your life like say a guy you like isn’t noticing you, or your having trouble with a subject ask him for advice.   Talk to him like a daughter would with her dad.   Make the first move; if you show him that you trust in his opinion as a father, maybe he will open up more like before.   

Cat:  Don’t allow the uncomfortable situation keep you from talking to your sisters either.    Keep the communication lines open between you and they.  I’m sure these family mishaps are affecting them too.   You don’t want to lose touch with your sisters.  

Dog:  When you and dad get to talk, stay calm, we know how frustrating this is but keep an open mind.  Know that he’s hurting just as much as you, possibly more.   If you don’t see him soon, then get your thoughts on paper. 

Cat:  Actually it’s not a bad idea to write a letter anyways, that way thoughts are clearer, your more prepared to tell him what is really going on in your head.  

Dog:  Good luck with daddy TB!  Paws and eyes crossed!   (Tries to cross eyes, which looks really silly)  Ouch!

name =  Ker

comments = I just have a quickie-q. Cat, what where you like in high school?

Cat: Hmmm that’s easy to answer!  I was star quarterback!  Had the lead role in the school play, everyone loved me so much I was class president and valedictorian and…

Dog:  Cat?  I don’t remember any of that.  You never played football, and….

Cat: Shoosh quiet Dog! (Puts hand over mouth)   Pay no attention to my simple brother.    I was quite the charmer with the ladies!  I was prom king and my lovely Tahlulah was prom queen, we danced the night away…

(Dog bites Cat’s hand off his mouth)

Cat: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW!!!!!  What you do that for?

Dog: Cause you shouldn’t lie, to Ker.  You may have not been on the football team but you always got A’s!   We both had a nice time in high school.    Cat was more the smarty type and I was very athletic.   Together we made a great team!

Cat: (soothing hand) Yeah we sure did.  Ouch.

Dog: Very sorry Cat.   Here.  (Hands Cat a fishcicle and band-aid.)

Cat: Yummy!   Thanks Dog.  Next questiooona (chomps away at fishcicle)

name = anna spicer

where = durant, oklahoma

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... i am so sad. Would you help me?

Dog:  Poor Anna.  You know what I like to do when I'm feeling sad, read a comic book, or go chase the garbage truck.  Things like that cheer me up.

Cat: Yes, but they give me a headache especially the chasing part.  What I enjoy is a nice can of tuna, a fishcicle (holds up half eaten) or curling up with a good book listening to music.   In other words, when you’re feeling sad, do things to feel happier.   Yes we know there's not a whole lot you can do when sad, like any emotion you just have to let it run it's course.  It's also better in some ways to not keep your emotions hidden, like if you feel you are going to cry do so.  Cause tears help replenish us, sometimes after a good cry one can feel just a little better.  You may be a bit tired, from it but in the long run it's better that you let your emotions out rather than bottle them up inside.   You’ll sleep better, and feel better in general.   

If the sadness persists, if you feel depressed for long periods and are not sure why, consider talking to someone about it.  Make sure it’s nothing serious than just a case of the blues. 

name = anon

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...

CatDog: Congratulations new mommy!   Sending lots of cyber hugs your way, so when is the baby shower?  Buy it a cute CatDog for its crib.  (grins brightly) Congrats to the proud daddy too!    

Cat:  Make sure to follow your doctor’s advice, and take care of yourself.  

Dog:  And make sure to wallpaper the nursery in little baby KittyPuppys hi ho diggety!

name = Crystal

where = NJ, USA

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...I don't know how to Inflate to fly. Can you show me how? Also, I dreamed about going to senior trips like to the mall and the movies. One more thing, I WILL WRITE TO NICK AND NICK SAYS THERE WILL BE NEW EPISODES PLUS A NON-TV MOVIE!!!

Cat:  Well we don’t have wings; don’t think we can help you there.    Take a trip somewhere and then you can get on a plane and fly that way.   Go to Florida and visit Universal Studios.  Go to Hawaii, and soak up some sun.

Dog:  Hi ho diggety!  More fan support!  That makes me feel all warmy!   

Cat: Yes keep writing those letters to our bosses, so we can keep entertaining you guys.   Thanks so much for writing and your support.

Next question.

name = rebekah sue

where = Durant

comments = dear meowwoof, I like your show alot.I love you!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cat and Dog:  Thanks Rebekah we love our fans too very much!  Keep watching and we’ll keep entertaining!   

name =

where = las vegas, nv

comments = p me Dr MeowWoof...

I HAVE JUST A PLAIN BLACK CAT. HIS PROBLEM IS, EVERYTIME HE EATS, IN ABOUT 2 TO 3 MINS. HE THROWS IT UP. ANY SUGGESTIONS ABOUT THIS PROBLEM. AFTER HE DOES THIS, HE DOESN'T ACT LIKE HE IS SICK OR ANYTHING LIKE THIS. HIS DIET IS DRY FOOD WITH WATER. HE LIKES THIS VERY MUCH. I HAVE TRIED HIM ON EVERYTHING HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY HEALTH PROBLEMS AND HE ACTS LIKE NOTHING IS WRONG WITH HIM.I DON'T LET HIM OUT OF THE HOUSE WITHOUT HIS LEASCH. HE CAN GO FOR A LONG TIME LIKE 2 TO 3 WEEKS AND BE OK, THEN HE THROWS UP EACH AND EVERYTIME HE EATS. HE CANNOT GET INTO ANY HOUSEHOLD PRODUCTS AT ALL. I GIVE HIM HIS HAIR BALL TREATMENT 2 TIMES A WEEK. LIKE LAST NIGHT HE THREW UP 3 TIMES. I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHAT PLEASE HELP ME, FOR I'M AT A LOSE AS TO WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM.

SINCERELY,

JEAN

(Cat hacks up a hairball)

Cat: Bleck, oh excuse me I’ll be right back, then I can answer question.

Dog:  It’s cool Cat.   I’ll answer it you go ahead and stretch to the bathroom, I’ll take care of this. 

Cat: You sure it’s a complicated one.

Dog: No problem Cat!  Go go!

Cat: (uneasy) Well all right.

Dog:   (looks to make sure coast is clear) Ok Jean, I can sympathize living with my messy brother and his hairballs, they can get so out of hand and he thinks me eating garbage is all gross.  It’s nothing compared to all the hairballs that get all over the house.  Thankfully Cat cleans a lot so the house doesn’t get too gross in hair balls, but sometimes it can be too much for even this garbage lovin’ Dog to handle.    The first thing I would recommend besides looking up the answers in books about cats and online, is to definitely talk to your vet.  Make sure that there isn’t a more severe problem there. 

(Grabs the 2 connected by glue lap top computers, and turns on Dog’s computer side, bones background desktop comes up and the internet connection barks while it dials, Dog pulls up favorite links, with a small list of recommended pet advice sites.)

Dog: Here’s a few sites that you might find helpful;

http://www.petcareadvice.com/cat/ILLNESSES/hairballs.htm  excellent article here about hairballs. And also a forum

http://www.animed.org/cats_hairballs.htm

http://www.petsmart.com/cat/answers/feeding/articles/article_11798.shtml   Pet Smart.com

http://www.geocities.com/thevirtualcatemporium/advice.html  Feline Advice and help, you can write your question right in there.

http://www.thepetprofessor.com/cat-info/cat-hairballs.html  The Pet Professor

http://www.katpuke.com/remedies.html  Katpuke site, remedies advice from other cat owners

From my research at these sites, maybe the answer is for your cat to get more fiber in his diet.  Check these sites with what the experts say, and get advice from your vet as well. 

Best of luck, and if you figure out how to remedy the hairballs let me know cause Cat is so gross with his hairball problem.

(Cat walks back and overhears what Dog is saying)

Cat: What?  I do NOT have a hairball problem!  I’m perfectly cleanly healthy and fine.   I can’t believe you’d have the audacity to... (starts making retching sounds and another hairball comes up)

Dog:  Oh no, you don’t have a problem not you Cat.  heh heh heh

Cat: Oh shut up Dog!  (Sits back exhausted from the hacking)  Next question.

name = Paulina

where = México

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... I love CatDog!!!!!!!!!!! It's my favorite TV show! And i can't stop watching CatDog on the TV and the Internet. I'm falling in love with CatDog.

(sorry for my bad english)

CatDog:  Hi ho diggety!  We love our fans so much from all over the globe!   Keep watching us, and checking out the fun sites online for CatDog.  Don’t forget to sign the Save CatDog petition if you haven’t yet.   

Cat: (sighs) If only there were more fans like this eh Dog?

Dog: Right Cat!  Maybe we’d be drawn in new episodes and a movie.   Hopefully someday… Just have to dream.  

name = gary

where = dallas texas

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... I have a...a math homework but I don't know 90x90=??? please help me!!!

Cat:  Well Gary, think of your simple multiplication tables.  What’s 9 X 0?  What’s 9 X 9?  That will help you solving the problem.   Whenever you need any kind of help consult your math teacher about it too.    Teachers appreciate students that come to them with a problem needing solved.

Dog: Eh, I just use a calculator…

Cat: Now Dog, Gary has to learn how to do his math without the calculator, because later when the math subjects get more complicated, like algebra, geometry, calculus, etc he may be permitted to use a calculator, but for now he has to learn for himself the basics.  When he’s taking a math test, he won’t be allowed a calculator, that’s like cheating.

Dog: Oh never thought of that way.  Don’t want to cheat!  Oh wowie kaboodles!!  I’m going to throw all the calculators in the house away then…

Cat:  No!  Don’t do that!  We still need them for our grocery budgeting, and taxes. 

Dog:  But Cat you said…

Cat:   I meant in school Dog.  We are adults now, and have acquired the skills necessary, we know how to solve 90 X 90 and how to spell encyclopedia.   We can use aides to make our tasks quicker. 

name = James Yui

where = Hong Kong

comments = Other than just problem do you like Yu-Gi-Oh?

Cat:  Yu Gi what oh? 

Dog:  Silly Cat it’s an anime cartoon.    Sure I watch it sometimes James, very action packed.  Cat doesn’t watch a lot of cartoons like me. 

name = sweetpie

where = Indianapolis

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... I have a problem with one of my guy friends. He keeps ignoring me and I want him to stop but I'm scared to confront him about it. Do you have

Cat:  Hmm… did you get into an argument?  Think about the last times you guys were together.  What happened?    Maybe he’s not mad at you at all, perhaps something very stressful happened to him recently and he’s having trouble expressing himself to his friends like you.  It’s up to you to reassure him that if something is bothering him, that he can trust you to tell you about it.

Dog:  If you value his friendship, you will have to take a deep breath and bravely ask him why he’s been ignoring you lately.  Maybe he doesn’t realize that you feel that way.  Invite him out with you somewhere to chat, and ask him what’s up. 

Cat:  We understand wholeheartedly the fear of confrontation.   Everyone experiences these types of obstacles with others. 

name = AYELET

where = DOMINICANREPUBLIC

comments = SHE DOESNT WANT TO BE MY FRIEND ANYMORE

Dog:  (sniff sniff) This is so sad.   I don’t like the thought of losing a friend.

Cat: Yes it can be tough, but sometimes people can change and want to move on to new people.  It’s no fun at first but eventually you’ll meet new friends.  

Dog: Maybe Ayelet, can regain the friend back by being super nice.  There’s also the possibility that the friendship is still there, but maybe there’s a miscommunication going on.  Talk to your friend, see what upset her and try to resolve it together.

Cat:  That’s possible too.  Like we advised Sweetpie, think about what happened.  Did you guys have a disagreement?  Did you treat your friend badly or did she treat you badly?   What were the circumstances?    Perhaps the friendship with patience and understanding can be rekindled.   It just depends on many different factors. The question you need to ask yourself is it worth trying to mend?  Think about what went wrong.   How well do you get along with she? 

name = steve "yao ming" greendale

where = houston

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...I have hypocondria! Every time, and every day I think I'm sick, when everyone says I'm healthy! I need a answer to get me out of this hypocondria!

Cat:  My first advice depending on the severity is to pay a visit to your doctor or a psychologist about the problem.    Hypochondriacs have trouble getting through daily life, because they feel stressed out thinking they are seriously ill.  This can interfere with your activities, recreational and work related.  If the fears are very irrational and disrupting your normal activity talk to a professional about it.      There are also many helpful websites online about the condition where you can ask professionals advice and read about the condition in more detail as well. 

(Dog starts tapping at his laptop again)

Dog:  Here’s a site with a pretty good article about hypochondria and also a test you can take to see the severity level of hypochondria symptoms. 

http://www.uib.no/med/avd/med_a/gastro/wilhelms/hypochon.html

http://www.uib.no/med/avd/med_a/gastro/wilhelms/whiteley.html

Also check out:

http://healthanxiety.com/   

Cat:   Excellent Dog!  Also, lately the media is packed with reports of deadly viruses going around such as SARS.  When media gets like this, it is pretty normal to react a little fearful and protective of your life and loved ones.    When your feeling frightened of these tragedies take some time to talk these fears out with someone you trust.   Making your feelings known can help you feel much better mentally as well as physically.  

Dog:  Don’t forget to take care of your body, eat a well balanced diet, and exercise regularly.  You’ll feel better physically because your taking care of yourself, and maybe the hypochondria will lessen. 

Cat:  Thanks for the question, take that test to see the results and talk to a therapist if you need help.

name = gori unio

where = california

name = kiesta
where = san antonio

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... I have a friend who cusses a lot.  You

know I still want to be friends with her. But cussing is bad how?

Cat:  Well it depends on personal views, age, situations, etc.  But is the question do Dog and I 

feel cussing or swearing is wrong?  The answer is no.  Each individual feels differently about 

swearing.  If you do a little research on some swear words you may find that they were not 

swear words at all at one time.  So then the question is how, when, where, and why did a 

certain word become a so-called bad word?  The answers can come out of society norms 

and different cultures.  Remember some gestures, words, may be derogatory in one country 

but not mean anything offensive in another.

Dog:  Hey Cat, you know when little kittens and puppies are around it’s not nice to swear in 

front of them.  

Cat:  This is the case of appropriate situations then.  Most parents do not want their young to 

hear swearing and adult topics around their children, because they want to keep the kids 

innocent until they get a little older.   These are times when maybe it’s good out of courtesy of 

others around you to do your best not to swear.  Whatever the reasons, some people feel 

uncomfortable when someone is cursing.  So out of courtesy to them it’s better to respect their

 feelings, if possible.

Dog:  Sometimes, I feel uncomfortable, but it’s mostly out of embarrassment.  I’m not sure 

why I feel bad about swearing sometimes.  When I’m alone or with you it doesn’t matter 

but if I’m in public and I say a bad word I get very mad at myself and embarrassed.  

Cat:  That’s because you are afraid that you might offend someone.  Perfectly understandable 

reaction, because you don’t know who around might freak because of a few swear words.

Dog: Well Cat, back to the question is it wrong to cuss? 

Cat:  In general, I do not think its wrong.  It’s just a more emphatic way to express emotions.  

Sometimes I feel that swearing is effective depending on what the content is about.  For 

example protesting, swearing can be louder, more of a cry to stop the madness of a world 

gone wrong.  How about good dialogue writing?   Since there are people that do in fact swear 

then is it wrong to write a story with accurate language portrayal if the characters swear?   

What about movies like Goodfellas with realistic dialogue that gangsters speak?  Would it be 

fair to have one of the gangsters say “golly gee” after being shot a few times?  Hell no!  This is

 why television censoring can get downright ludicrous and annoying.   

Dog:  Good points Cat.  So as long as you don’t mind the cussing then don’t worry about it.  

But if your worried about getting in trouble around others then ask your friend nicely when

around your parents, family, whoever to curb the swearing. Save it for atmosphere where it’s 

ok to swear.   However, don’t let swearing become a constant habit, there are a variety of ways

 to communicate besides using cuss words.

Cat: Hope this helps some.   Thanks for the question Kiesta! 

name = Joe

where = Australia

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...I have been trying for 2 years to find  (to buy ) a catdog 

T Shirt. I would be verygrateful if you could inform me where I can buy a catdog T Shirt 

(preferably in Aust , but doesn't have to be)

Dog:   G’day Joe!   

Cat:  Great to meet Aussie fans!   I wish we had a direct solution for you but we don’t.   There 

was one store we heard that sold adult size t-shirts briefly for CatDog.  That was called Hot 

Topic.   Unfortunately I don’t think they sell them anymore.   Man I hate this Dog it just pisses 

me off so bad that we have all these fans that want to express how much they like us but when

 it comes to finding merchandise it’s like a scavenger hunt!  How irritating.   Have you checked 

eBay? 

That is a good site to find rare stuff as well.  We know this one very big fan got a lot of CatDog 

items off of eBay. 

Dog:  If you can’t find any officially type ones you can make t-shirts at home with special iron 

paper that can be bought for the computer to print out any type of picture on the computer and 

iron it on to a white t-shirt.  That’s a good way to have an authentic one of kind t-shirt.    These 

make nice gifts for your friends too you can make a hobby out of making homemade t-shirt 

iron-ons.  

Cat:  Great idea, but it still angers me that we aren’t more accessible to fans.

Dog: Me too Cat but that’s where fans when all else fails need to put their creative sides to the 

test.   

Cat:  We can’t stress enough to make your voice heard fans help keep shows alive.    Next 

question.

name = anon

comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...My dog farts

Cat:  SO does Dog waaay too much! 

(A rank smell hits the air)

Pew!  See what I mean?  Why do you have to act like such a dog Dog?

Dog:  Woops guess I ate too much Taco Depot today. Excuse me. 

(Holding nose, cat hurries to open window)

Cat: Ah that’s better.   Breathes fresh air. If this is a serious problem, consult some of the pet sites we recommended to Jean.  Those might help with pet digestive trouble.

(Dog lets another rip)

Cat: Damn Dog!  Would you give it a rest?

Dog: I can’t help it, it was all that garbage I ate.  Guess it didn’t digest properly.

Cat:  Oh man, Thank god that was the last question I’m out of here!   

(Cat starts to run away quickly, forgetting he’s attached to Dog, and snaps back next to Dog, which causes CAT to pass gas this time.)

Dog:  Ack!  (Waves hands) That was worse than mine!   Think it’s time to visit the little CatDog’s room.

Cat: Agreed! 

(CatDog get off the couch and hurry up the stairs to the bathroom, shouting.)

CatDog:  Thanks for the questions; sorry we have to rush off like this.   Take care gentle patients, and have a nice summer! 

(CatDog hurry upstairs, and slam the bathroom door)

2nd Issue

the name = DreamCatcher
where = SPR,AR
reply email = it moves with the moon and the stars that twinkle
comments = Dr. Meowwoof;
I have had wierd dreams, a little before and still curtrently at 
times. They range ussually, if I remember them, to dreams with a freind 
of mine in them who is female... to as scary and rare as dreams of some 
guy trying to kill me and ussually the guy i don't know with me IS 
killed. He must be VERY unlucky o.o; I also remember a dream that was 
more like a odd nightmare of myself and my parents living next to a house 
that burned down, only to go by the house and into it and find symbols, 
ones I know as being not wiccan... but more, how to say... demonic. 
<p>
The question I wanna ask is... Is there any perfessional or 
laymans term or explaination for these dreams I am having? I mind none of 
those with my freind in them, but the more disturbing ones i could do 
without for a while. And my dream-catcher apparently needs new spiritual 
batteries or to be hung somewhere else.

Thanks and i wait for your solution.... ~DreamCatcher

Ummm.. Don't think THIS problem calls for a hug exactly... o.o maybe 
later. *^^*

Dog: Ooo dreams. Remember that time we dreamt we were all black white an gray and could sing really really good? That was fun. But I don't like the nightmares. Nightmares are so scary why do we have nightmares Cat?

Cat: Well Dog, I'm not for certain but I know that we need to dream. Dreaming is essential for the mind to stay stable and not go hay wire. It's a helpful way for the brain to be able to tell the difference between reality and non-reality. Dreams are just abstract confusing ways to tell us something. Nightmares are horrible I know, but I believe in some ways that they are just as essential to us as pleasant dreams. Now of course you must consider how often you are having nightmares. If you are experiences nightmares very frequently more than normal, then something could be bothering you a great deal, and you need to take steps to figure out what that is. It doesn't hurt to talk to someone about it, maybe a counselor or psychologist if you feel it necessary. Think about what is happening in your life, did something very traumatic occur, are these nightmares constant? If so then you should consider counseling or talking to someone you trust.
Nightmares help to show us our deepest fears, only in a confused frightening manner. Nightmares are supposed to be frightening if they weren't then they wouldn't be nightmares, they would be pleasant. There's different degrees of nightmares, there's ones that make you feel mildly uncomfortable, and then there's others so extreme you wake up sweating, and or screaming, etc.
I wish I had the answer as to why we need such unpleasant dreams sometimes. But I don't have a definite answer. Maybe no one truly knows why we dream, but I strongly feel it's necessary.

As for analyzing your dream specifically, there's a few possible things I can see. A guy being murdered next to you could be a number of reasons, could be your fear of a loved one dying leaving you all alone. That no matter who the person is and how they die, that maybe your afraid to be alone. A common fear we all have from time to time.

Dog: Lonely feels so.....lonely. I don't like when I feel lonely. And even though I'm attached to Cat sometimes I fear becoming lonely. Losing Cat. 

Cat: Yes me too, as much as I strive to be alone sometimes just have time to myself, I fear losing Dog as well sometimes. Back to what I was saying, another possibility to watching another person die could just be your curiosity in death. Now don't freak out with what I'm saying that doesn't make you weird, it's actually quite normal. Death is something we just can't escape, so naturally we fear death and dying we fear the nature of it, and wonder if we will die before we get old. We wonder what it's like to die. Not that we think about it all the time, but we wonder what it's going to feel like, to look like to die, what's going to happen us.....which brings me to the wicca or satanic symbols your seeing. That's your brain processing your beliefs and questions in religion and what is out there after we die. Perhaps your parents living next to a house that burned down is similar, it's like your brain is seeing close calls, with that guy that was murdered next to you, we say that could of been me, likewise the house next door burning down could be your brain saying that could have been my parents. Thank goodness it wasn't but what will I do when the day comes? What will I do when any of my loved ones leave me? How will I deal with it? 

 Another important thing to realize about dreams is that they are inside your brain they are not being transmitted to you from another brain.  Therefore your own interpretations of your dreams is more than likely correct.  For example; say your worried about something, your worried about paying a bill on time, so you constantly dream about green bugs attacking you.  You could then assume the green bugs symbolize money, and the worry.   That kind of interpretation makes sense, and you'd probably be right, simply cause you dreamt it, you analyzed it, you related it to your real life problem.

Dog: Aww I dreamt of Roachie one time but I didn't have a bill problem I just missed him.

Cat: No Dog you don't understand, your bug dreams are different.  Everyone's dreams are different and have their own special meaning.

Dog: Oh!  I think I understand now Cat. Wow dreams are very complexy!

Cat: Indeed they can be.  Hope this helps Dream Catcher and thanks for writing, wishing you a very pleasant dreamland journey.

I also have a question: Does Dog ever purr?

Dog: (starts singing One fine day with a woof,

Cat: and a PURR!

CatDog: a baby was born and it caused a little stir..

Dog: hee hee It is very catchy isn't it? I love our song it always gives me goose bumps!

Cat: Yes as do I. 

Dog: Cat it's so neat to meet so many fans that love us so much!

Cat: Yes and there's nothing wrong with loving us, especially moi! hehe

Dog: I think a lot of people have obsessions. I know how much I love Mean Bob he's the coolest!

Cat: Yes obsessions are normal, as long as they don't totally take over your whole life. I feel though that passions and being obsessed with something is actually quite fun! I can remember the time I had my extreme obsession with Mean Bob action figures. Well I guess that did get a bit out of hand, but I can remember the pleasure and excitement I felt every time I could add to my collection. Obsessions in cartoons, TV shows, movies, books, a sport, hobby, whatever is something that can help keep us alive keep us happy and have a little extra purpose in life, besides normal everyday life concerns. Think about the reasons you love us so much, I'll bet they are quite similar to the reasons that other extreme fans love us. I for one think that we are a good obsession to have, and I'm not just saying that to love me more, I'm saying that cause our cartoon has very positive messages about getting along with others. Our show makes the viewer think, instead of just stare blankly at the screen. You guys all wonder all sorts of questions.

Dog: Like how we built our house, how we attached our TVs together and built a 2 headed snowman, how we take a wiz,. how we walk and run in rhythm without dragging one another unless it's the garbage truck in which case I just can't help myself, and...

Cat: Yes, yes I know I still have the bruises and more OUCH! Anyways, Roger enjoy what you love. If it helps and you have the time there are ways online you can join and share with other fans of your obsessions as well, forums, websites, mailing lists, etc. There's all sorts of ways to keep the obsessions alive and enjoyable. So just have fun and don't worry it's healthy to love characters, shows, books, etc, just as long as you keep a good head on your shoulders and can distinguish between reality and fantasy.

Dog: NEXT!

Dog: That's not very nice of those to friends putting you in the middle like that.   It sounds like some good solid communication is in order here.  Tell them how you feel that you don't like feeling in the middle, they are taking advantage of your niceness.  Something that happens to me a lot too.   Like take Cat, and Winslow for example, those two don't get along all the time, but I get along with them both very well.   I guess that might be sort of the same idea.  Or at least close to.  I get so mad sometimes too wanting to tell my brother and Winslow to knock it off and get along for a change!  *folds arms with stern annoyed look*  

Cat: (looks at Dog surprised)  Dog, I didn't know how strongly you felt about that.   The thought never occurred to me, mostly because Winslow's latest schemes make me incredibly angry all the time and..(mumbles under breath sulking)

Dog:  (emphatically) Tell them you don't want to be apart of talking behind each other's friends back like that.  It's very mean!  And feriends don't talk about their ferends meanly at all right Cat?

Cat: Well...actually Dog it may not always be a nice thing, but even friends can talk about other friends.    Not that it's right to do that, but nobody is perfect and sometimes friends feel comfortable enough to talk about the friend that isn't there.  Think about yourself too Water,  do you join in with the I don't like how he acts when...etc even just a little bit?  It's a very common human flaw to gossip and talk about others behind their backs.  You don't want to offend and hurt that person's feelings so it's done when that person isn't around.  It's quite possible that when your two friends are together and you aren't there that they are talking about what annoys them about you as well.    Does that mean you guys think less of one another does that mean that your friends aren't your friends?  More than likely not.   Sometimes full blown honesty and criticism towards another is hard to say and much harder to take.   Remember too that everyone is different and even the most stable of relationships still have problems getting along fully.   People have disagreements and will always face at least one thing that bothers them about another person.  It doesn't matter how much you love the person, and or how much you have in common, at least one trait about them will bother you.   Even now, think about your question to us, sure you may have used an anonymous handle, and your friends more than likely won't know that you in fact wrote to us about them, but the key is the question IS a complaint about them.  So in a way you are talking behind their backs.  Before solving this problem of what your roll usually is in a group of friends, it's helpful to understand why people in general use the outlet to rely on other ears to complain about someone.   Usually it's because people don't want to hurt someone's feelings directly like that.  There's also fear, fear of the criticized person's reaction.  The person not facing their friend directly doesn't want to get into a fight, or doesn't want to hurt their friend's feelings either.  

Dog: hmmph!  In my book that's very cowardly Cat!  Friends should always be direct and honest. With one another.  Sometimes fighting is healthy too.  Look how much we fight, but then after a while we feel better cause we got our feelings out.

Cat:  It's not that I don't agree with you Dog, it's just that humans aren't perfect and can make mistakes like talking behind another's back.  Everyone does it, from time to time, even if they don't realize it.  Water needs to take a deep breath and forgive her friends, mentally, for their foibles.   THEN have it out with them.  Water should tell them that the way they act towards one another is putting a strain on the relationship. I know it's easier said than done, but try and see if talking might resolve it.  Here's an idea, why not talk to them privately, before talking to both at the same time.  Ask your friends why they talk about your other friend so much.  Don't be afraid to tell them how you feel, tell them you feel stuck in the middle and don't want to choose sides, you just wish you all could have fun and get along.  Be daring! Ask them if when you aren't around if they talk about you too sometimes and see what they say individually.  Tell them to please to be honest with you.  If they are your friends they will be honest.  

Relax, I think it will all work out.  Have confidence in your feelings, but understand the insecurities your friends may feel.  I get the feeling that they are jealous of one another, and competitive.  As a result you are just victim to the competition.  Think about their personalities.  Do they have difference in opinions with lots of things?  If they suddenly became connected would they act like Dog and me?

Dog:  Cat, I think it's super that Water is such a nice person and easygoing, it's a great way to be.  

Cat:  I agree!  Water you are ok in our book.  

Dog:  Don't ever feel that the way you get along with everyone is a bad thing.  It's a good asset to have.  Charming and easy going people are the easiest to talk to and enjoy.  Keep your friendly disposition and you won't have to worry about never having a friend.  

Cat: Ooo love the name! Expurrts on us is the only way to be! *purrs* Well this is a very common problem among new couples, but a very easy fix. Yes I know us handsome fella's are harder to buy for than you luscious lovelys out there, because there's so many possibilities. Personally I would get you a rose as lovely red as your lips, and a necklace charm the color of your eyes to bring out that romantic glow and....

Dog: *pokes Cat* Hey wake up your doing it again getting off topic and flirting like a naughty kitty! I think as a guy if I was dating a female type of someone I would want them to ask me what I like, and in turn I would ask my girlfriend what she likes it's the nice thing to do. Plus it's very friendly too. We could do lots of talking and talking all about us. It would be so much fun. *dreamy sighs at the though of having a friendly girl around*

Cat: Yes a very good idea Dog. You see Xpurrt if I was your boyfriend I would feel very flattered and loved if my girlfriend asked me what I was interested in asked me what books, movies, and music I like. 

Dog: MEAN BOB! I like Mean Bob I want Mean Bob toys for Christmas and Evil Eric video game too! *starts panting like crazy*

Cat: Doooooog!!! Anyways communication is always best. I realize how difficult since your just getting to know the nice guy that it might be to ask him what he's interested in your nervous afraid of reactions, and that's understandable, but I think if your honest with him and direct that he will appreciate it a great deal. You can even make it into a romantic game. You could have him sit on your lap (depending on if you could handle it, though if I was your guy I'd rather you sit on my lap ooohh mama) and you could say to him coyly and sweetly so what do you want from miss Santa Claus this year little boy? And maybe after a little flirty answers he'll tell you. When the flirty answers are over, tell him your serious, that you want him to have a nice Christmas from you, and you want to get him something he will like, so what is it you like Cat? And he'll respond I like big yarn balls, and classical polka, and white fish chub. 

Dog: Yes, but what if she wants to surprise him Cat? Not just get him exactly what he says? Surprises can be lots of fun! 

Cat: Ah good point. Well then ask specific questions to get an idea then, ask him what his favorite music groups are, does he have a favorite sports team, favorite TV show, movies, books....etc These type of answers produce a wide range of possible gifts. T-shirts, posters, books, etc, anything that stems from something he enjoys. There's also another very helpful option, asking his friends, and family what he might like from you for Christmas as well. That can help you too. But remember even though you and your boyfriend have only been dating for a little while, I can tell by your question that you care for him a great deal, and do express interest in getting to know the nice guy better. Asking him about his interests and hobbies is a great way to continue getting to know him better, and also gives you a chance to reveal some of your interests as well. Like meeee. 

Dog: AND ME!!!! *big silly grins* Great advice Cat! I agree, communication is key to long lasting friendships and more! Have a hi ho ho ho diggety Christmas, don't stress you will make the right decisions I'm sure.

Cat: Yes.. well Ren is my buddy!  We listen to opera together and read.  Such a delightful time.

*phone rings*

Dog: *picks up phone* Hello?.....Stimpy!  Hi buddy!....Oooo really??....Thanky thanky for inviting us!  We'll be there!  *hangs up phone*

Cat:  What did they want Dog?

Dog:  They invited us to their big holiday party tonight!  So we better get ready soon after this, how many letter are left?

Cat:  Well that appears to be it for this time.  Lets hurry and get ready.  Thank you so much fans for talking to us.  We wish you a very happy holiday and super new year celebration!

Dog:  Hi ho ho ho diggety!  

gets up off the couch, and hurries off singing....."There's nothing that's better than Christmas with CatDog I wish we could do it all the year looooonnnggggg!"

1st Issue

• Name: Anonymus,
• Location: somewhere

  My mom is being really invasive lately. She's been storming in on me while i'm in the shower and getting changed, then when i tell her to get out she yells at me. She also reads my diary, asks me about every single thing i do at home AND school. She also pretends to be me on the Internet on Messengers and stuff, talking to my friends and asking them about stuff I do. It just really isn't fair that some people are so free, and others, like myself and a few other people I know, including you guys, have absolutely none at all! One time I breathed a little too loudly and mom thought I was angry about something and wouldn't rest till she found out what it was. She wouldn't buy the answer 'nothing's wrong, i just hadn't breathed for a few minutes and needed to take a big one.' She tells me the people I should hang out with and who she doesn't like, which is virtually my entire group of friends, and she also reads my letters before I even get a chance to. She also screams at me when my marks are bad but that's another story entirely... I know the reason she does all this isn't to annoy me, it's just because she loves me, but why doesn't she show that love by leaving me alone once in a while?? Sorry this is way too long... hehe
  
  CatDog giggle a little bit...

  Dr. Meow: Oh, sorry for laughing try being connected to a brother ever since birth it's not easy to find privacy.

  Dr Woof: heh heh heh yeah, but we manage.

  Dr. Meow: If anyone can understand issues of privacy it's us, like that one time Ingrid...oh never mind. whoops (blushes)

  Dr. Woof: Cat! I'll start this one off. Umm (scratches head thinking) your mom loves you, it just sounds like she's maybe over protective. But that means she cares too.

  Dr. Meow: Very good Dog. Also depending on your relationship with your mom, she may feel that as your getting older that she's losing you. Afraid that she won't know who you are, so she's using the protective snooping mom tactic to make sure your safe, and to also have some idea of what you are doing. Think about how much you communicate with your mom. Do you come home from school and just say hi and rush to your room? Perhaps you aren't talking to your mom enough. Maybe you should set some time to spend with your mom.

  Dr Woof: Have a nice hearty heart.

  Dr. Meow: Tell her how you feel tell her that you appreciate how much she cares for you and her concern, but to please respect your privacy from time to time, ask her nicely to knock on your door because you might be changing. Just in doing so try not to shut her out, realize that she loves you so much and wants to remain close to you. Next time you have a nice conversation with her, go ahead and tell her about that crush you wrote about in your diary. Ask her for advice on how to deal with things that are bothering you.

  Dr. Woof: Grown ups know lots of wise old stuff. It's cause they've been there before.

  Dr. Meow: Exactly! Your parents were once your age too. If she's asking you constantly about things in your life, maybe it's time to tell her, but tell her BEFORE she asks. Yes I know some things you want to keep private obviously we all have our secrets but maybe if you start telling her some things that are going on, maybe she will ask will ask you less.

  Dr. Woof: Set some mommy kid time.

  Dr. Meow: Reassure her that she won't lose you, and if need be re-introduce yourself to her.

  Dr Woof: Hi mom my name is (name) , and I love to watch CatDog, and my favorite music group is....(name of group) heh heh heh

  Dr. Meow: Something like that... Hope this makes sense. Thanks for writing to us anonymus!

   

  ---

  name = Erin, where = N.Y.

  comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... My dad always embarrases me! whenever a friend of his comes to our house,he always tries to tell him or her of my crush to cat and goku.(i couldn't decide which is cool). and he always saying things like"oh erin's in love with samurai guy" i'm sick of it.and he always picks and pokes at me,he even yells at me when i do something right.he even threatens to punch me or pull my hair. how can i tell him to stop without making him even more mad at me?

  Erin
  
  Dr. Meow: (all flirty blushy) Cat? as in...me Cat? You like me you really like me! YES! A date! I need a date, (gets off couch to get a bouquet of flowers)

  Dr. Woof: Cat get back here Erin needs our help!

  Dr. Meow: "Oh yes umm right. Sorry I (purrs) like the attention. eheh (strokes ear back) (clears throat collecting composure)

  Dr. Woof: It sounds like her daddy might be acting kind of mean but not mean to.

  Dr. Meow: I don't think her dad means any harm, he's just teasin' and funnin'. It's a typical parental unit thing. However some communication would be a good idea.

  Dr. Woof: (GASP) communicat-shieeon! Very very important.

  Dr. Meow: Talk to your dad, tell him how you feel. Tell him very calmly that your feelings are being hurt, and that you feel uncomfortable when he tells his friends personal things about you. If you can, ask him why he teases you. More than likely he just likes to joke around, which sounds very familiar....

  Dr. Woof: WINSLOW!

  Dr. Meow: Yes Winslow....(looks around making sure Winslow isn't around and starts to whisper) you see, deep down Winslow is a good guy and he likes us, and we like him, it's just that for some reason he enjoys playing jokes and teasing.

  Dr. Woof: I think some are just like that they just like to be a little mischeesy-us!

  Dr. Meow: That's mischievous Dog!

  Dr. Woof: With Winslow it's mischeesy-us! heh heh heh

  Dr. Meow: (sighs) ohh boy...

  Dr. Woof: Daddoo loves you Erin, and wants what's best, just tell him how you feel. Also, try not to take it to heart, as long as someone isn't doing harm intentionally laugh it off. Laugh WITH them, as they always say.

  Dr. Meow: Thinking, back I can remember one time, mom, dad, Dog and I were all just talking and they started reminiscing about an embarrassing moment of mine. I freaked out and yelled you always pick on me! And they just stopped laughing, they apologized but were disappointed that I was so offended. The conversation tone just changed for the rest of the time. It wasn't my intention to make everyone feel uncomfortable I just wasn't thinking, I was offended too easily but upset my family that I love dearly, and that had no intention of hurting me. Sometimes it's best to just let things go in one ear and out the other. Laugh with your loved ones as Dog said. I do try though my best, it's just difficult.

  Dr. Woof: Awww Cat, it's ok, you are getting a little better about things, not so quick to jump to conclusions. But Cat, It was good of you to express your feelings to us, even though we were just having fun, I'm very glad you told us. Because we knew to be a little careful and understanding. We knew what was bothering you and apologized for making you feel bad, even though it wasn't intentional.

  Dr. Meow: Thanks Dog, it did help me feel a little better to tell mom and dad and you what was bothering me.

  Dr. Woof: See Erin? Communica-shion. It's good to let those around you know what's running through your head.

  Dr. Meow: Also realize that you're not alone, lots of lovely gals love mmmoi!

  Dr. Woof: (hands on hips)

  Dr. Meow: Well ok, like cartoon characters a lot, whoever they may be. It's nothing to be ashamed of at all. You are not alone, there's lots of fans that have crushes on cartoon characters, tv celebs, etc. Read Katsie's question she likes me too. Purrs everyone loves meeeeOOOOWW. Whoops there I go again, sorry Dog, umm next question please.

   

  ---

  name = Bella Luna

  comments = Dear Dr.MW. I am curious, to say, whether or not I should follow in the foot steps that I once saw so fitting for myself. Tedious, as this may sound, but I have found myself debating on the subject of following my dream instead of my reality and once again destory all my hard work that I have intended to keep to since my sophmore years in high school. Do you find it more ethical in life to rise up to societies needs and potiental or to dream it and be it like one's mother always tells them before the nightly bedtime story ritual of their elementary school days. Or, is it merely a state of mind that one can't do it all and that Budah is our true hero in this world. Funny, I should dare rant this over to you. Surely you have no seen all this world has to offer already--of coarse...nobody really has, unless they are in the spirit world now. Which, is inconclusive to the rest of us... Have you ever actually read the Grapes of Wrath or maybe even something less harty...how about...The Joyluck Club? Nothing can be more strait forward than that, but still have a heart appeal. Is it so simple, that the mind no mater how one ponders it's self...CAN always be wrong? I am curious, my dear egosolistical one. Very curious indeed....

  Ergo, Bella Luna

  P.S: And can you have a hug you ask? Why, I'm sorry but now *I* most conclude and analis here. A border line personality is quite a stand out in society, I do so wonder what you do with all your spare time...Are you shunned from society my dear? Do you tremble and hide, whimpering at the shun they present to you on a daily basis with your hotdog fingers and twinkie crumbs? Or am I merely...being a skeptic? Another thing, you are more than welcome to "identify". I do so hope, *I* cheer you up.

  For Bingus, you have done me MORE than some good.
  
  *Cat's face gets a little red in anger, while Dog scratches his head confused*

  Dr Meow: *yells* How dare you insult me! I read Steinbeck when I was a kitten.....

  Dr. Woof: Cat! Calm down, what's wrong with you we are supposed to be helping our fans not yelling at them.

  Dr. Meow: Umm Dog, I don't think this person is a fan of ours. They are trying to put us down, for what we are doing since we aren't professionals.

  Dr. Woof: They are?? but, but why?? (sniffs) We just want to help. Sure we may not have all brainy smarts like doctors, but feriends count on ferends all the time to listen and have compassion.

  Dr. Meow: (takes a deep breath, calming down) Ok I'm better.

  Dr. Woof: Good. So why would Bella take all that time to make fun of us. and with such pretty poetry-like?

  (Cat sits, back and thinks, more calmly and rationally)

• Dr. Meow: Hmm well I believe that Bella has some insecurities in his or herself. So Bella decides that putting someone else down might make she or he feel better. Bella, I do commemorate you on your intelligence, I share the same talent of course, but beware of your own vanity. It's good to be humble sometimes. I will never claim to know everything, no one does...

  Dr. Woof: But Cat you know lots of stuff how to cook white fish chub how to read good, and....

  Dr. Meow: Shh I'll explain it later Dog.

  Dr. Woof: We aren't going to hurt you, it's just not the right thing to do. I may not know as much as my brother but I think you should think about how much you could have hurt us, and anyone else you may have hurt before. People and animals can only take so much. I hope that you don't treat everyone like this, if you do then you may have to face a lonely life someday.

  Dr. Meow: I don't think Bella acts like this all the time. the power of the internet anonymity allows someone to unleash a side of them that they may repress. This letter was a puuurfect example of that.

  Dr. Woof: Oh that's kinda sad I feel bad for them.

  Dr. Meow: Learn to let things go. You don't like this idea, that's fine it's a matter of opinion. Find peace within yourself to not lash out at someone whether it's anonymously or to their face.

  Dr. Woof: Yeah and if you don't have something nice to say don't say nothin at all!

  Dr. Meow: Yes...

  Dr. Woof: Well, I guess that's about it there.

  Dr. Meow: Yes, I don't think I have anything more to add. Vale. *waves*

   

  ---

  name = anonymus

  comments = I have this huge group of friends that I love at school, fifteen of them to be precise, and now they've all split up. Into three little groups. But seems I'm caught in the middle. See, i haven't gotten REALLY close to any of them, so they all want me to join their new group. I am already in one of them, with all my real friends, but my other friends all asked me to come sit with them at lunch and all they did was talk about the my real friends behind their back, and I didn't like it at all because one, they are my friends, and two, coz I don't like talking about people behind their back coz it's mean. How can I tell the other two groups that i don't want to join them without hurting their feelings?
  
  Dr Woof: (salutes) oh such bravery this chokes me up a bit. (sniff)

  Dr. Meow (hands Dog a tissue)

  Dr. Woof: HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONKKKK! (hands back to cat) Thanks Cat.

  (cat freaks and throws it as far as he can)

  Dr. Meow: Doooog!

  Dr. Woof: Sorry Cat.

  Dr. Meow: anyways....

  Dr. Woof: I feel better now, can I take this one Cat start it off?

  Dr. Meow: huh? Ok smarty pants be my guest.

  Dr. Woof: Thanks Cat, and I'm not wearing any pants.

  (Cat slaps his forehead, and Dog continues to speak)

  Dr. Woof: Well Cat, may not exactly remember this but I to went through a similiar problem. You see, anoymus, umm well if you saw our Back to School episode you realized that I was kinda popular and cool. Well, being attached to a not so popular brother I was always pressured to ditch him leave him at home when all my buds wanted to go cruisin for chickens. Yet strangely we never ate any chicken just talked to girls heh heh Well I always said no way I told them that it's either he comes with me or none of us at all!

  Dr. Meow: *hiss* I remember that, I remember getting little notes from your friends that if I did or say anything I'd get pounded.

  Dr. Woof: You did? You should have told me. Here I always thought that they eventually accepted you.

  Dr. Meow: (starts tearing up) No. I... excuse me...(walks off to get more tissues)

  Dr. Woof: There you see that Anonymus? See what can happen to friends that you do care about and vice versy? Stay strong Anon, and follow your heart. Take time to sit down and decide who in your life is more important to you. I chose my brother as most important. In the end if you do what you feel is right then you are one up on those not so good friends that just want to hurt each other. Backstabbing, rumor starters, are not real friends. A true friend is hard to find sometimes but when you do find a true ferend you should do whatever you can to hold onto them, even if it means jeopardizing your social status. You have to decide what is more important, true and honest friendship where you can tell them anything, without fear of them blackmailing you someday or you can give into peer pressure, and not have a trustworthy friend at all. Think about when the chips are down, who is going to still be there for you? Say you do something embarrassing like trip. Who is going to laugh at you as opposed to who is going to help you up? The ferends that help and show real care, are the ones you want to keep for life.

  (cat sits back down) Dr. Meow: Dog, that was beautiful. (hugs Dog)

  Dr Woof: It's how I feel. (hugs back)

  Ok, as for their hurt feelings, it's good of you to want to keep peace, but you still have to follow what is right for you and there's no guarantee that feelings will remain stable. If they don't want to listen to you, then it's possible they're not worth the effort, and perhaps need to grow up a bit. Tell them nicely that you don't want to hurt your friends feelings, that it hurts you hearing them talk about others like that, and that you don't want any part of a group that puts down people. I wish more people were like you, that want to be nice, the world would run more smoothly. Keep that up, continue your kindness and everything will turn out alright because you'll have real people that care about you enough to let you cry on their shoulders. So go ahead and tell them as calmly as can how you feel, then if they get sassy with you, take it, and then go back to the lunch table where your REAL friends will give you a hug. Your true friends will appreciate you more for choosing them.

  Dr. Meow: Wow, Dog very insightful. I didn't know you had it in you.

  Dr. Woof: I've had lots of experience listening and learning from you Cat. (hugs each other again)

   

  ---

  Name: Eddie
• Location: anywhere but here

  Dear Dr. MeowWoof, I have this problem I want my parents to accept me but we don't agree on things sometimes. They want me to go into business when I'm done with high school and go to college but I don't want to, it seems so cold and just not me. I want to do something where I'm helping people like teaching or becoming a nurse or something, I also love to write and maybe would like to be a writer someday. But they hate my ideas and worry that I will be poor and a failer. What do I do? How do I talk to them about my dreams and what's important to me? All they seem to care about is money but not things that are real important. It's like living in a family of Rancid Rabbits and me feeling as insignificant as Eddie! HELP!

  Dr. Woof: Aww I think it's great that you want to be something helpful like a teacher or nurse. It's great to help people. I really appreciated a lot of my teachers they were so nice and kind to all of us.

  Dr. Meow: Wow, gaining family acceptance can be extremely difficult, especially if the family expects an exact replica of the parents from their children. The only advice I can offer, is to stay strong as you possibly can. Follow your heart and what you believe. It sounds to me that you have it inside you to be a fantastic individual and a very kind, person to those around you. Striving to be yourself in a group that is so different from you isn't easy, and it takes a very strong individual to do so.

  Dr. Woof: But maybe if you talk to them it might help.

  Dr. Meow: If it helps take time to sit down and write what you want to accomplish in life. Write it as if you are writing a letter to your parents. Tell them you love them, and respect their opinions but more than anything you want them to respect your feelings too and if possible love you for who you are. Assure them that you know what you are doing, that your goals are very important to you and that someday these goals will make you a very happy and fulfilled individual and adult. What is most important for you to realize though is that YOU come FIRST. It's great to want family acceptance, but what's important is to be happy with your own accomplishments. If you spend all your life trying to please others before yourself you won't be happy you'll be miserable.

  Dr. Woof: Everybody is good at some things. and others are good at other things. And you can't please everybody too.

  Dr Meow: mmhmm So be strong Eddie, stand up to those Rancids for what you believe in. Be prepared first before going in. Treat it like a job interview preparation. Gather your thoughts, anticipate what they might say, their contradictions to your thoughts, and be prepared for some reactions you may not like. But remember as your family as your parents they want to feel that you will be secure in your life and just want what's best for you, even if it may not be what you feel is right. Realize that their reasons have good intentions, but prove to them that they can trust your decisions. Best of luck to you.

  ---

  name = anonymous
• where = NY
• replyemail = crenky@eyahoo.com

  comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... I keep getting stomach-aches

  Dr. Meow: Well what did you eat today? Did you eat too many sweets? (burps) I know that Dog always makes my stomach feel sick when he eats too much garbage. So try an apple or a carrot something healthier next time you have a snack.

  Dr Woof: Or just take one of those tasty minties we take for umm heart firey stuff.

  Dr Meow: Heartburn Dog. Antacids for heartburn and other minor stomach troubles. Or maybe you aren't eating enough if your experiencing hunger pains make sure you are getting the proper amount of food to eat daily. Stay healthy anon! Next!

   

  ---

  name =

  comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...iwillhaleyou

  whatdoyougottodo. theyisfun.

  Dr Meow: Umm was that a question? Are you asking us what your supposed to do here? If so I'll just answer. Got something on your mind go ahead and type in the box to us like help I have a problem with this one boss, or my parents just grounded me for....etc Just something anything you want to say to get off your mind a bit and feel a bit better. Cause we all need a helpful listener sometimes.

  Dr Woof: I have very big ears too see! (sticks long ears up) heh heh heh

  ---

  name = Katsie
• where = California

  comments = Dear Dr. MeowWoof:

• Hey. I'm 16 years old, in 10th grade. I dunno what to say... but first I'll tell you somethin' really really weird, ok. I have just the most huge crushes on cartoon charas. I have never been interested in dating in my entire life, always focusing on my own future instead of some loser-guy clinging to me for the rest of my life. But I've often developed just huge loves for random cartoon characters. (have I mentioned I absolutely adore Cat?)

  I don't know. Is there something wrong with me? I have never felt lonely for a boyfriend or anything, because that's an obvious conclusion alot of people make. Just not true, though. I'm even afraid of commitment, but that's not for a really long time... in having a crush on a 'toon character, you wish you could be with them, touch 'em (yes, sometimes in the pervy way), love 'em and speak to them even. You may do all that through drawing if you got the knack for it, or writing if you're up with that too. But I got friends, and somewhat a life, and this toon crushes thing is a major addition to my life I simply love to have in my state of mind..but compared to society, am I a total mentally-deranged freakass, or just...an individual? Care to help on that? n.n

  Dr Meow: (heart starts beating out of chest) Awww another lovely lass that appreciates moi. Gosh now why if all these girls like me can't I get a date? Call me Katsie k? 555.....

  Dr Woof: Cat! Your doing it again! Focus. Katsie needs advice. Well while my brother is busy making googly eyes, I'll start this off. You are not alone, I've met a lot of fans that have crushes on us, and other fellow cartoon pals of ours. We are oh so very flattered to be just as loved and admired as human characters like Pacey, or that really cute Buffy. And lets face it, some characters are just drawn really really really good looking. (slicks hair on head back a bit) hmm committing.....oh maybe that's it there or at least part of it. That with liking us no one can hurt you there's no fear of being hurt by cartoon or movie character. Is that uh right Cat? Cat?

  (making little kissy noises)

  Dr. Meow: What? Oh.. right right.... Sorry I got distracted umm yes ok I'm better now. Katsie, with liking me, or any cartoon character you don't have to worry about being hurt. That's one thing that is so appealing about liking characters, you can create your own stories with them on your terms. You can draw or write them sharing a romantic date with you and not worry of being rejected, or getting a broken heart. It's fantasy, and anything goes in fantasy.

  There is nothing wrong with you, everyone has their own ideals and fantasy thoughts. However, I worry about something that maybe you might want to think about. Being afraid of commitment could mean deeper problems your facing. How is your parents relationship? Are they divorced? Do you have any family or friends that are having relationship troubles? Perhaps you are afraid to take the dreaded bf step because of relationships around you that might possibly be suffering. It doesn't sound like you are ready for a bf-gf relationship which is fine. It's best to not rush into things when your aren't ready.

  But realize that no relationship is perfect, and that just because relationships around you might be suffering that that doesn't mean that yours will. You have to when ready, take a deep breath and learn to trust someone romantically. Sure, it's a risk, putting your romantic emotions into another person, but life is full of risks. And just remember that just because your Mr. right of the future may not see eye to eye with you on some things, think of how many times Dog and I see eye to eye. Hardly ever, and we fight like cats and dogs but we still stick together, because we are brothers and love each other unconditionally.

  Dr Woof: Are you saying to give up on character crushes?

  Dr Meow: Not at all. Again, fantasy is just that fantasy and there's nothing wrong with whatever tickles a fantasy. What is inside you inside your brain no one can remove from you. And they don't have to right to either. It is also important to remember for your search of Mr. right someday that maybe what you are liking in cartoon characters you will fall in love with someday in a human. Like me, oh..(gets all blushy and proud) I'm so smart, and handsome and know what I want in life. Maybe that's the type of guy you'll fall in love with someday, a smart, handsome, and cultured guy. And there's nothing wrong with that. meeeoOOOW. And you know what, even if and when you start dating you may still like cartoon characters romantically. And what of your date, perhaps he'll find the lovely animated ladies like Tahlulah appealing as well. I mean who could blame him Tahlulah is simply...(growwwwwll) OOOOH MAMA!

  Dr Woof: There's a lot of fans that find us toonys attractive. So there's no need to feel a freak not for that reason at all. Be proud of who you are, and you know what something might surprise you. You may find out someday that there are friends or relatives of yours that you never expected that think some cartoon characters are really really really good looking. So don't ever feel alone, the romantic love of cartoons is a widely shared fantasy of most animation fans.

  ---

  name =
• where = mass.

  comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof...case of malaria.

  Dr. Woof: Oh my! Go see a doctor then!

  Dr. Meow: YES RIGHT AWAY! HURRY! Next question.

   

  ---

  name = Dustin
• where = usa

  comments = your show is cool and i like it a lot.

  love, Dustin

  Dr Woof: Aww that's so nice.

  Dr Meow: Yes nice to be appreciated. Thank you Dustin and we appreciate our fans like you very much too.

  ---

  name = Stephen
• where = Texas

  comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... I have a question how in the world do catdog do their business if you catch my drift

  Dr Meow: Well you see it's like this here's the secret.....(phone rings)......hello? Oh ok I won't reveal our secret for CatDog Candy business...right....yes,,,,,mmhmm....ok......see you tommorow Mervis.

  Dr Woof: Cat I don't think that's what Stephan meant.....

  Dr. Meow: (covers Dog's mouth, and gets out next letter)

   

  ---

  name = chelsea
• where = wales

  comments = Help me Dr MeowWoof... I need a new brane

  Dr. Meow: Ohh...(shivers at a past memory of Dog sucking up his brain power, through all the educational videos he watched)

  Dr Woof: You ok Cat? Hi Chelsea well just read and study harder, buy some educational videos and.....

  Dr. Meow: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOG NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

  Dr Woof: Cat? Why are you shouting. What's wrong felineus?

  (suddenly Cat starts seeing things and sees Dog's brain look like it's very large and starts to hyperventilate. Scared of the Smarter than Average Dog sequel.)

  Dr. Woof: ooooooooook. Umm ok fans think we will step off the Dr's Couch till next issue. Cat looks like he needs a Doctor right away. Hi ho diggety fans hope we helped you all some. (waves, and picks up a very frantic Cat, to take to Doctor Rancid) Take care everyone!

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